Let’s get things started with one of the countless internet denizens who has no idea what an ellipsis is actually used for.

yeah yeah.. stealing is wrong…
But… no one was killed… or harmed very badly…
and the guy got away…very creatively by the way.
For all I care… if this guy is going to go across the country robbing banks in this manner… have at it, as long as no one is maimed or killed in the proccess…
Man that makes for a good news story. HAHA!

Yes, anarchy is always welcomed as long as it makes for hilarious fluff news. By the way, did you hear about the man exposing himself to children? No one was maimed or killed, and the news report used a cartoon duck to cover his genitalia! Hilarious!

It would seem that local police have a regular Keyser Souce on their hand.

Look, you’re already on the internet. Could you not spend 2 seconds to check if you spelled Keyser Söze correctly? Also, Keyser Söze murdered his own family before butchering the majority of the Hungarian mob, so, no, the police DON’T have a regular Keyser Söze on their hands. Jesus. Why didn’t you just jump straight to Godwin and say the police had a regular “Hitler” on their hands?

I wonder if he is a relative of D.B. Coopers?

Again, you have access to the whole damn internet, could you not have maybe done a little research? I mean, props for knowing one of the great unsolved capers in US history, but negative props for associating it with a guy who will probably be caught the next time he logs back into Craigslist.

this thing is so funny, now someone need to make a movie

What the hell?! You just read the whole damn story! Are you really admitting to the internet that your imagination is completely incapable of recreating this story that you’re DEMANDING someone charge you ten bucks for the privilege of watching what you just now read? Sweet pie-baking gorillas, you’re an idiot!

haha clever
at least NOW he’ll have some good pillow-talk to tell his new boyfriend in prison.

I was beginning to wonder if I was actually still on the internet, what with the lack of research and palpable homophobia.

people are crazy these days.

Well gosh, I sure am glad you decided to chime in on this delightful little anecdote. Just couldn’t let this story go by without tossing in your two cents, huh? I guess “ha ha” seemed to pedestrian and “omg wtf” was just outside of your grasp?

Too bad the idiot American voting public could not and cannot elect a President who can think ahead and plan like this.

Because what would the internet be without a self-righteous, thread-jacking asshole with a political chip on his shoulder?

Right out of the gate:

I think everyone is sick and tired of bubbleheaded hollywood types making stupid political statements. They have turned alot of people off with their ultra-liberal and down right ignorant views…

I agree with Jeff on this one. Too many hollywood types voicing their liberal political nonsense has turned me and my family from watching their shows. In fact I will go a step further and say that everyone I work with feels the same.

Absolutely. I’m tired of funding those anti-America weirdos.

We don’t tune in to watch anything on NBC, ABC, MSNBC or CNN anymore. They’re too biased!

About the only thing we watch on television anymore is the news on Fox along with Bill O’reilly and Hannity & Colmes.

dito with all the above comments. I quit watching tv when hollywierd starting pushing its left-wing agenda. At least return to a moderate posistion or I won’t come back. I don’t need your agenda in my household.

You know that when you switch over to CBS and see 3 obama ads all within 10 mintues that it’s time to turn the channel, for GOOD!

TV broadcast programs are finished !
I have not not or ever will I watch any of the programs , On CBS ABC NBC, especially with that talentless Letterman!CBS is off limits
in my home .no substance, terrible acting,in fact unreal..where do this find said Actors, In fact ,They Ltterman Leno, Mauer,are not funny,just sarcastic ,try to pass this off as Humor.
I guarentee they will not be around Next year.
Poppa Gus

Grey’s Anatomy? Ugly Betty? Shouldn’t these “shows” be on Bravo, the Gay cable channel? TV is for non-thinking lemmings who bend to the Left and need to be told what to think.

Kieth Olberman is loud-mouthed douche with a very large head.

I have seen Jamie Kennedy’s movie Heckler so I will preface my comments with “In my humble non-professional opinion”, My name is Earl has run its course. The writers are starting to go soft. What next? A fantasy sequence where they all dress up in medieval attire, or go back in time to gangster days in Chicago. It should have ended when he went to jail.
The Office is starting to look tired also, still entertaining, but its luster is wearing thin. But they are BOTH better than that 30 Rock. I can only ascribe 30 Rock’s staying power to the fact that there are so many “Red Sea pedestrians” on that show. Same reason “Arrested Development” kept on long after ratings should have killed it. I realize writing is a difficult profession to maintain high ground and I appreciate the efforts, but yawn, Its all getting so predicatable and been there done that. Feel free to come to my job and criticize my software, I deserve it.

(I never need to see “Nobama” again. Seriously.)

It goes on for about 900 comments or so, if you’re curious. You really don’t need to click over.

Never fear! On the Geocaching website there’s a discussion forum, and one of the topic areas is “GPS and Technology”. Perhaps you can get some buying tips there.In fact, there is currently a thread posted there entitled What is the best GPS you can get for cheap?, I’m pretty sure a lot of people want to know.

Seems like a simple and obvious request here on the Geocaching.com forums, yes? Well keep in mind that when it comes to technology you’re dealing with geeks, and for geeks, the best way they can help you when you ask a question is to demonstrate how the question was stupid.

reef mapper starts us off by deciding that he’s had enough of the whole “online community” thing.

Go and do your own online work

The smiley lets you know he’s just kidding around, but he still fails to answer the question.

Wesbo, however, feels he just can’t recommend a good inexpensive GPS receiver on the Geocaching.com website because there’s not enough information in the question to go on:

Best for what? Geocaching? Boating? Getting to and from the mall? You can get a used etrex for a song on ebay and you can get a Trimble surveying setup with sub-centimeter accuracy for the price of a pretty nice car.

Need some specifics…

Motorcycle Mama agrees that it’s impossible to suss out what this guy on the Geocaching.com’s forum wants a GPS for:

What are your intended uses? (geocachin, car, motorcycle, hiking, boating, other?)

Source GPS wishes that Sherlock Holmes were around to deduce the poster’s (on the Geocaching.com forums) intended use of the GPS device:

I have to agree with MM. You need to identify what the primary use will be - then you can narrow down your choices by price.

ryleyinstl takes a bold and misspelled gamble:

I’m going to take a leap here and say you want an “affordable” GPRs for geocashing.

Amazingly, he actually recommends a unit!

jmundinger thinks ryleyinstl’s detective work might be good, but he still hesitates:

And, although I have some level of agreement with those who suggest that the question can’t be answered without also knowing something about intended use and budget, I’d note that the Venture HC will do (and do well) everything that a person has a right to expect from a consumer grade gpsr.

LEGO Cacher brings the hilarity:

Here’s the best “cheap” GPS’er that you can get: (photo of a magnetic compass).

Finally, KUBLECLAN takes time off from his CSI work to respond with:

I would assume they only want the GPS unit for caching …

Nevertheless, he doesn’t make a recommendation.

At the end of the thread on the Geocaching.com forums asking for recommendations on a good and cheap GPS receiver the score, out of eleven replies, is:

2 serious recommendations (one of which is supported by another person).

1 joke recommendation.

4 people who can’t figure out what he might be using it for.

1 person who does know what he might be using it for but doesn’t recommend anything.

and 1 guy who says to “do your own online work”.

Hooray for Web 2.0!

they don’t look like who they’re supposed to be…. not even Scotty, this is either just them as Actors without the Rest of the Makeup or lame versions of the Characters. The first Poster looked like the Characters more.

I can’t be the only one who thinks Pegg’s hair looks funny. They could’ve tried to make it look a little more like Doohan’s hair.

Not impressed with the four new images AT ALL! Abrams could have EASILY taken shots where the actors would bear more than a hint of resemblance to the original cast members. The current photos don’t look like them in the slightest! Looks like he’s aiming for the 14-17 year old crowd and totally disregarding any care or concern for the original fan base. Where would be the harm in striking a tone that would satisfy both? Typical New Hollywood crap

OK, I guess not. What do you think, all caps guy?

THIS IS A DISASTER SULU IS IN BLACK WHILE THE REST OF THE CHARACTERS ARE IN THEIR NORMAL DIVISION COLORS WHERE SULU SHOULD BE GOLD BECAUSE THAT WAS HIS DIVISION NOT COUNTING THE PLOT WHERE HE WOR A BLUE UNIFORM CLEARLY THE PEOPLE HAVE NO UNDERSTANDING OF THE FUNDAMENTALS OF TREK THIS IS A DISASTER

Is it just me or does Yelchin look like Bashir at first glance?

I have to say John Cho reminded me of Garret Wang (Harry Kim) at first.

Why does Scotty have Tuvok’s hair???

Pegg looks more like Tony Shalhoub as he did in Galaxy Quest

Is it me or does John Cho look like Robert Beltran (Chakotay)?

Karl looks vaguely like Wolverine in that shot….LOL

I don’t get what they’re trying to do with Scotty. He looks absolutely nothing like James Doohan.

“McCoy” looks like SUPERMAN in that new poster.

And Urban’s McCoy looks eerily like a young Robert Forster.

Scotty looks like George Jefferson in that picture.

When I saw the picture of Urban/McCoy, I thought he looked like John Barrowman from Doctor Who/Torchwood.

I keep seeing Miguel Ferrer as Scotty in that poster of Simon Pegg’s.

I hate repeating myself, but in the timeframe of this movie McCoy would be off on Capella 4 (43 light years from Earth, in case anyone is interested, on a planet very unlikely to survive inceneration around such a star), Uhura’s idea of sweet-cakes would be Bill Cosby’s jello pudding on her birthday cake with 8 or 9 candles in Kenya, Kirk would yet to be a Midshipman on the USS Republic with Finnegan, or the best friend of Gary Mitchell, or the human who would not entirely trust his Vulcan Science Officer until getting to know him better after Mitchell’s death.

Thanks to reader John for all the research done here and going after the choice bits presented. I just read the feed because I like Star Trek way, way too much to get near most of its most ardent followers.

With the summer upon us, the Get Off The Internet staff has been doing our best to live up to our name. I’m sure that once autumn’s chill hits, we’ll be posting much more often. Remember: it’s OK to unplug and go for a walk every once in a while. (But not too often: AICN might have updates about that remake of Death Race 2000!)

Also:

This movie is going to bomb and be the biggest disappointment like everything else hyped up these days. I think this movie is an abomination and I being a die hard Star Trek fan will not go and see it. I am sick and tired of the remakes attempting to benefit on the backs of the original creators.

JJ Abrams will have egg on his face on this one. I for one will just keep the memories of Star Trek and just accept that it is an era long gone and can never be re-created. I’m fine with that.

But heck, that’s not what we’re here for. Because, you see, the mechanic? It was a woman. And therefore, we know who and what is really to blame:

“mike” starts the show:

another example of the fine job women do in the workplace… i’ll bet she cried for equil pay too

“SHORTY” smells a conspiracy, loudly:

IF THEY COULD ONLY HAVE MOVED THE BUSES THAT QUICKLY
FOR KATRINA.

YOU GOT IT. HOW OLD WAS THE PLANE AND
HOW OLD WERE THE OTHER TWO. THE AIRLINES HAVE A
WONDERFUL ACCOUNTING DEAL WITH THE IRS. THEY PROJECT
THE NUMBER OF HOURS THE PLANE WILL FLY. ESTIMATE
THE FUTURE REPAIRS AND MAINTENACE. THEY THEN DEPRECIATE
ALL FUTURE COST IN TODAYS DOLLARS. DOES THE TERM DEPRECIATION RECAPTURE ON SECTION 1245 PROPERTY RING
ANY BELLS.

EVER SEE THE WORDS DEFERDED FEDERAL INCOME TAX.
THEY CALL IT A TIMING DIFFERENCE. CARRIED AS AN ASSET
ON THE BALANCE SHEET. DOES THIS MAKE ANY SENSE.
IS IT REALLY A CURRENT ASSET THAT AFFECTS THE QUICK RATIO?

IF YOUR GOING TO BUY AIRLINE STOCK MAKE SURE IT’S SOUTH WEST.

Although some folks call foul on the poor reporting in this version of the story, “Buzz” is here to put us back on task:

I got this one. She was pretending to fly the aircraft, it turned her on so much. When she stretched her legs out in orgasm she hit the wrong button. The controls were still active from her pretend time earlier. ;o)

“Jeff” goes straight to the source of the problem:

Another empty kitchen……………….

“John Casy” takes time out from being a 30’s P.I. to comment:

Just another dumb broad doing her thing… Should not let broads work or be near airliners…

Another “Mike” puts “cleaning” and “woman” together:

I bet that the switch wasn’t written in spanish. “Don’t push this cuz it will cause the plane to start and taxi into anything in its path”

“Darkenwyck” continues the stellar reporting:

Have any of you actually read the article? It says she died in the accident.

You can’t put one over on “BOB”:

PUSH ONE BUTTON IF IT WAS THAT EASY WE’D HAVE PLANES ALL OVER THE PLACE

“Ed” provides Comedy Gold by quoting lines from “Airplane!” that don’t correspond to the situation at all.

(Not quoted here. We’ve all seen the movie.)

“Tracy” feels that an important detail was missing from the story:

Was she black?

Another “mike” steps up with this clever wordplay. GEDDIT?

Just another example of Can’t Understand Normal Thinking

“Anthony” envisions an even worse scenario!

Thank God it wasn’t the doomsday button she pushed.

And finally, “Rob” asks us all to be calm and rational about this:

Well now . . . it is very true that there are both men and women that should not be working around airplanes. Incompetence is and equal opportunity malady.

Now, here’s the difference: Incompetent men are not educated, hired, and promoted to positions where they can inflict that much damage. However, incompetent women are educated, hired, and promoted all the time, because affirmative action forces schools to admit them and employers to increase the numbers of women (and minorities) in the workforce — even in cases where competent women are simply not available. Now, in some disciplines, this may not a problem, because the typical woman is as good (or even better) than the typical man is (which might help explain why more than 95% of RNs are women).

But in certain areas like engineering and mechanics, let’s just be real — it is not a strong suit for women. Sure, you can point to a handful of women who can do it (just like you can find a handful of men who are good at being nurses), but for the most part, female mechanics and engineers exist because affirmative action programs have forced universities to admit them and companies to hire, train, and promote them. Imagine what a disaster area your local hospital would be if affirmative action was forced upon universities such that 50% of nursing students were female, and then the hospitals were REQUIRED to hire and promote them. Me thinks it would be a huge disaster looking for a place to happen . . . as was the case with the lady mechanic on the airplane.

You think I’m crazy? OK, fine . . . try naming me five significant engineering or mechanical innovations that have as their principal architect, a woman (without using google). Can you even name three? one?

The gems, of course, all come from the guys that make sure your business functions well in between marathon sessions of WoW and Mountain Dew Code Red runs.

This is just bullshit….The companies that fire their employees after a year of employment ask for it…it is so simple…don’t hire someone if you want to fire him/her afterwards….Japanese are smart….after all the yellow race is the superior than others…
It is simple…..we lost !

This is why it is so critical that management handle their tech personnel carefully. If you need to let one of them go, for whatever reason, it’s not a good idea to make it a public event or a heated argument. It only takes a knowledgeable tech a mere minute or two to initiate an attack that will severely cripple the business.

It’s generally a good rule of thumb to not talk down to your local tech during any period of their employment. That will only guarantee you poor and slow service when you need it and will make that techs termination even more potentially hazardous.

So if you like to be the hardass boss to the employees in your charge, tone it down for the techs. Treat us with kindness and you’ll reap the benefits!

I’m amazed at some of the HUGE sentences handed down for mostly “irritating, not life-threatening” crimes. Even some killers don’t get 97 months jail, and it was only a s**t Banking Institution!! Somebody must have been REALLY pi**ed off!

One last word for IT management, you’re only in control because us techs let you be because we like you and the way you treat us. Don’t cross us unless you want to lose your job too.

Its not the poor treatment of the employees that caused them to go off. Its their poor mental state that caused them to go off, most of us with the knowledge and ability to pull off such sabotage would never do it. We might think about it and fantasize about it but never actually go through with it..
NERDS RULE!!!

Here is a hint to resolve these common plagues from network admins…

Treat your administration with respect and as if they are actually valuable!

The more companies and management treat their administration like dirt, the more problems like this will arise.

Either that, or send the admin jobs to be outsourced in India. You think it’s hard understanding the guy from 7-11, try getting your password from him and understanding what he said.

If Corporate management would use just an ounce of respect, maybe things will be different. But since that will never happen, maybe you’ll think twice about treating your admins and engineers like the geek you kicked around in high school.

I would suggest that Terry Child is probably a disgruntled homosexual. This is the type of behavior you will see from such persons. Another example was the homosexual that blew up the turret on a navy ship after a falling out with another homosexual lover.

So, what have we learned? That IT guys are overbearing, loudmouthed whiners who don’t understand why people don’t like them? Or that companies need to have better procedures in place? Or is that the gays are always up to no good? U-DECIDE!

You can demonstrate your pet’s political affiliation with a shih tzu dog for obama button or declare that you are Reppin’ for Obama, or enjoy some shrinky dink art of Obama with Mr. Potato Head.

Perhaps you would like a Liberal hand embroidered resin magnet or Bill Clinton earrings.

Or, you can cover your head with a Unique Doo Rag with Republican Print while dressing your baby in a John McCain pirate onesie. There is always the option of accessorizing with a scrabble tile McCain necklace. You can hang some Not George Bush Framed Embroidery on your wall.

Etsy! Something for everyone!

“Thank you Superman,” Brainy said looking up at his blue eyed hero.

Superman smiled down at Brainy, glad that he was able to save him in time, and that he could hold Brainy in his arms. He loved the feeling of being near him and holding him. Clark remembered when he saved a woman in the 21st century they would give him a kiss. He wished that Brainy would do that too.

Glaring down at the two, Superman X wished that Superman would stop holding Brainy so close.

“What are you going to do with the snake,” Lighting Lad asked, interrupting Superman X angry thoughts.

LoSH Doujinshi

“So, tell us your name and your superpowers.” said Cosmic Boy.

“My name is Mariah LeClaire,” she said, bowing politely, “and…uh…well…I don’t really know what my superpowers are.”

“You, don’t know what your powers are?” asked Lightning Lad, raising an eyebrow. Mariah shook her head in the negative.

“Well sorry, but if you don’t have any powers I’m afraid we ca-…”

Lightning Lad was interrupted by a very enthusiastic looking Chameleon Boy who, at that very moment, leapt towards Mariah, transforming into a huge beastly looking dog. Mariah gasped and, having no time to dodge, raised her hands up to offer some protection from the attack. After realizing a few seconds later that there was no impact, Mariah looked up.

“Whoa!” was the only sound she could utter. Without knowing it she had put up a force field. It glowed green with energy. Chameleon Boy growled and struck the force field a few times, with no luck. He pulled back as Mariah’s force field had faltered and disappeared. He took this opportunity to transform into a colossal snake. Hissing, he lunged after Mariah once more, ready to sink his fangs into her body. She shot her forward in desperation. Suddenly black sparks flew out of her hand encircling Chameleon Boy and forcing him to switch back to his original form. Everybody in the tribunal stood up, marveling Mariah’s apparently newfound powers.

Letters and Photographs

“B-but Brainy, we need you. I mean, where will you go? And whom can you turn to when you need help? W-will we ever see you again,” she whimpered. Brainy sighed, putting his other bag down, and held her in his arms. He was hurting her again. She had become his best friend and had stuck with him through thick and thin, even when she had lost her memory, she was there. She flung her arms around him and cried into his chest.

“I’m sorry, Vi. I-I’m sorry. It’s just the way things are,” he whispered, his hand stroking her black hair. She leaned upward to kiss his cheek. As her lips came in contact with his warm cheek, he remembered when that first mission that they were on together. He didn’t really like her at first. She was ignorant and so naïve. And he thought that her powers were useless. But yet, she proved him wrong after saving him from the destructo-bot that was holding him down with its hand. She then earns more respect from him after she had assisted him with Lightning lad’s surgery. And she did so much more for him.

She accompanied him to the spaceport and gave him one last hug before watching him aboard the star ship.

“I’ll miss you, Brainy,” she quietly said as she saw him wave goodbye to her from his window.

Ritual

“Well…all right. I’ll give it a try. Just because you’re my sister, and I love you.” Nura breathed deep, composed herself, and concentrated.

After a moment, her eyes flew open in shock. “Mysa, I saw…you and Dirk, making love!”

If it were possible, Mysa grew even paler than usual. “But…that isn’t…I’ve never…”

“What?” Nura stared at her sister, astonished. “Never?!”

“Some of us spent our lifetimes in study, Nura, not chasing the pleasure of flesh!” Mysa snapped, her shrill tone revealing her consternation.

I wanted to mention what a shame that people like this woman keep bringing up “lynching” and in the same way, do a disservice to the black community.

Many blacks paid for HER civil rights with their lives. Does she get that or are their deaths just so much more politically expedient for the joy of using that word like some self-fulfilling prophecy or something?

I wonder if all the family members of those who’ve been lynched would accept such “death politicization?” It’s really a shame.

One more thing, it must be so “hard” to be black like her. Accuse others of “lynching” when they criticize you or even immortalize you in a cartoon.

Oye Vay, Ms. Evers-Williams needs a new schtick ’cause this one’s gettin’ real old. Do you think she cares about the impact of illegal immigration in the black community?

For those not in the know, here’s an article about Ms. Evers-Williams deceased husband.

Yes, that’s right. The widow of slain civil rights activist Medgar Evers was just accused of not only being stupid, but of not appreciating the sacrifices those in the civil rights movement have paid.

So, are American conservatives just completely and utterly without any sense of shame or human decency, or hopelessly stupid?