ZEN!!! Scriptures (![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/syndicated.gif){kind=small} dj_zen) wrote,@ 2005-06-11 17:15:00 |
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Appropriate Pressure
Listening: When I step into t...
Appropriate Pressure
Listening: When I step into the light my arms open wide, when I step into the light my eyes searching wild, would you not like to be sitting on top of the world with your legs hanging free? Would you not like to be ok?
I have found that when you're dealing with a girl that you think is attractive, it's all about the appropriate pressure. Too much pressure, and you scare the girl away. Not enough pressure and you risk not even being considered or missing out on something that could potentially be. It's a tough call to make and I find that I have been thinking a lot about it over the past few days.
Last night was one of the events that made me think even more about this idea of pressure and such. It was Totoro's birthday dinner, and I was to meet him, Glare and Totoro's brother at Anthem for dinner and drinks. I got a call right after work saying that they were running a bit behind and to see if I could go secure the reservation, so I did.
When I got the Anthem, I talked the hostess about the reservation and made my way to the bar to wait for my three dining cohorts of the night. I knew they were a long way off so I ordered a Hendrick's & tonic and cracked open my book (Best Food Writing 2004). When I chose my seat, I sat with one empty chair between myself and this rather striking girl. She had medium length brown hair, olive skin, a purple blouse and a nose stud. She looked classy and elegant with a touch of edge, just enough to keep things interesting. I chose that seat on purpose. After she ordered her Mango Martini, the barrkeep offered her a dinner menu which she refused because she was meeting friends. He offered me a menu next and I declined as well due to the fact that I was meeting friends as well. He asked if we were meeting the same friends, and I responded, "Hmm, not unless you're here to celebrate [Totoro's] birthday as well, to which she responded, "not unless you're here with a party of all girls." I thought for a second and said, "You know, I really have no problem with that."
After that little exchange, I smiled and turned back to my book. I didn't want to be that sketchy guy who hits on a girl at a bar. I have never been that guy. However I really did want to talk with her. She turned her attention to the TV where the Sox game was on and I continued reading. I knew what I probably would have said. I would have busted out the "So you work in Boston? What do you do? I am a mutual fund accountant by day and a cook at a fine dining restaurant by night and hope to be a chef of my own restaurant someday..." But those words never came out of my mouth. I didn't want to pressure this girl into having a conversation, though someone has to initiate if anything at all is to happen.
Before long, some of her friends show up and I decide to be chivalrous and give up my chair so that they can all sit and drink together as they wait for the rest of their party. Before long, my crew showed up and we made our way to the hostess stand to get our table. As we're standing there, I feel a little bump of a hip-check. It's the gorgeous girl in the purple blouse.
"Your party's all here?" she asks me.
"Yeah. How about yours?"
"They all just showed up too," she replied.
I paused for a second.
"So, is it girls' night out tonight?" I ask.
"Yeah," she said. "We do this every so often."
Now that's where it ended. Their table got served just before mine did and I didn't get a chance to talk to her again. I didn't even find out her name. I should have. I could tell that it had potential, but I didn't apply the appropriate pressure to get the number or a name.
Sometimes I think about my dates with this girl that I have gone out with a couple of times and I wonder if I'm applying the appropriate amount of pressure. I wonder if there are things I need to say or do to get her juices flowing, so to speak. I think I am much better at the girl thing than I have been in the past. I think that my range of coming on too strong and being non-existant have really shrunk, but I'm not to that ideal range yet. I'm not yet the daddy of the mack daddy. Maybe I'll get there someday.
Appropriate Pressure
Listening: When I step into the light my arms open wide, when I step into the light my eyes searching wild, would you not like to be sitting on top of the world with your legs hanging free? Would you not like to be ok?
I have found that when you're dealing with a girl that you think is attractive, it's all about the appropriate pressure. Too much pressure, and you scare the girl away. Not enough pressure and you risk not even being considered or missing out on something that could potentially be. It's a tough call to make and I find that I have been thinking a lot about it over the past few days.
Last night was one of the events that made me think even more about this idea of pressure and such. It was Totoro's birthday dinner, and I was to meet him, Glare and Totoro's brother at Anthem for dinner and drinks. I got a call right after work saying that they were running a bit behind and to see if I could go secure the reservation, so I did.
When I got the Anthem, I talked the hostess about the reservation and made my way to the bar to wait for my three dining cohorts of the night. I knew they were a long way off so I ordered a Hendrick's & tonic and cracked open my book (Best Food Writing 2004). When I chose my seat, I sat with one empty chair between myself and this rather striking girl. She had medium length brown hair, olive skin, a purple blouse and a nose stud. She looked classy and elegant with a touch of edge, just enough to keep things interesting. I chose that seat on purpose. After she ordered her Mango Martini, the barrkeep offered her a dinner menu which she refused because she was meeting friends. He offered me a menu next and I declined as well due to the fact that I was meeting friends as well. He asked if we were meeting the same friends, and I responded, "Hmm, not unless you're here to celebrate [Totoro's] birthday as well, to which she responded, "not unless you're here with a party of all girls." I thought for a second and said, "You know, I really have no problem with that."
After that little exchange, I smiled and turned back to my book. I didn't want to be that sketchy guy who hits on a girl at a bar. I have never been that guy. However I really did want to talk with her. She turned her attention to the TV where the Sox game was on and I continued reading. I knew what I probably would have said. I would have busted out the "So you work in Boston? What do you do? I am a mutual fund accountant by day and a cook at a fine dining restaurant by night and hope to be a chef of my own restaurant someday..." But those words never came out of my mouth. I didn't want to pressure this girl into having a conversation, though someone has to initiate if anything at all is to happen.
Before long, some of her friends show up and I decide to be chivalrous and give up my chair so that they can all sit and drink together as they wait for the rest of their party. Before long, my crew showed up and we made our way to the hostess stand to get our table. As we're standing there, I feel a little bump of a hip-check. It's the gorgeous girl in the purple blouse.
"Your party's all here?" she asks me.
"Yeah. How about yours?"
"They all just showed up too," she replied.
I paused for a second.
"So, is it girls' night out tonight?" I ask.
"Yeah," she said. "We do this every so often."
Now that's where it ended. Their table got served just before mine did and I didn't get a chance to talk to her again. I didn't even find out her name. I should have. I could tell that it had potential, but I didn't apply the appropriate pressure to get the number or a name.
Sometimes I think about my dates with this girl that I have gone out with a couple of times and I wonder if I'm applying the appropriate amount of pressure. I wonder if there are things I need to say or do to get her juices flowing, so to speak. I think I am much better at the girl thing than I have been in the past. I think that my range of coming on too strong and being non-existant have really shrunk, but I'm not to that ideal range yet. I'm not yet the daddy of the mack daddy. Maybe I'll get there someday.
